Tuesday, June 22, 2004
um...yay!
I'll say it again...I miss him. I'll say it until I can't. Because I miss him. It's really odd because I've gotten to where I don't care really but then there are things that bring this on...
Sid was on webcam a second ago...He did that once for me and I dunno why that was just fun and whenever I watch anyone's I think about that. He is such a wonderful person but just has so many problems and that just hurt to watch. I've heard a term used for a disaster that goes "It's like watching a train wreck." That pretty much sums up watching someone you care about, and would die for if ever in such a situation, continue to screw up their life ... almost purposely and not even give a shit.
I have to wonder what would have happened if he hadn't. Where would I be? Would I be here? Of course not. I'm too incredibly stupid to have not killed myself. Well, having faith in God I'd like to believe I would be alive...I just don't know. There are things that happened because of him being a part of my life. And certainly things that didn't. I need to stop contemplating would-have-beens. It gives me a head ache.
And that person I mentioned in my last blog. He's good right now. I hope. because what I did yesterday may have me banned from everything for a while if my sister mouths.
I just redid my HumanForSale...I've gone up! To $1,887,246.00! Somehow!
Bye folks.
¶ 5:57 AM
Sid was on webcam a second ago...He did that once for me and I dunno why that was just fun and whenever I watch anyone's I think about that. He is such a wonderful person but just has so many problems and that just hurt to watch. I've heard a term used for a disaster that goes "It's like watching a train wreck." That pretty much sums up watching someone you care about, and would die for if ever in such a situation, continue to screw up their life ... almost purposely and not even give a shit.
I have to wonder what would have happened if he hadn't. Where would I be? Would I be here? Of course not. I'm too incredibly stupid to have not killed myself. Well, having faith in God I'd like to believe I would be alive...I just don't know. There are things that happened because of him being a part of my life. And certainly things that didn't. I need to stop contemplating would-have-beens. It gives me a head ache.
And that person I mentioned in my last blog. He's good right now. I hope. because what I did yesterday may have me banned from everything for a while if my sister mouths.
I just redid my HumanForSale...I've gone up! To $1,887,246.00! Somehow!
Bye folks.
¶ 5:57 AM
